Storm Front by SF Writer (Tyrel "Rock" Wolf) Season 5: The End of Innocence 'The end of innocence is realization' Chapter 5.14 - Goodnight, My Love, Goodnight 6,757 words Back to Chapter 5.13 Part 4 "Ever Hopeful - Part 4" On to Chapter 5.15 "It Ended on a Bus" Chapter Index Drama/Angst Rated PG 13+ Proudly presented by The Tarheel Writer - On the Web since 24 February 2003. Celebrating 21 Years on the Internet! Tarheel Home Page |
Sarah walked out of her doctor's office and sat down next to Mike. She gave him a small smile and reached across to hold his hand. Mike was in a daze, staring straight ahead, blinking quickly, trying not to cry. Sarah did the same, staring straight ahead of herself as she sat beside her husband.
For a time the couple sat in silence, neither sure what words could possibly accompany this moment. Mike was speechless, almost numb. He held his head in his hands, still coming to terms with recent events.
Sarah rubbed his back and leaned her head on his shoulder. Instinctively he pulled her onto his lap and held her with all his might. Still no words came. Perhaps none were needed.
* * * * * * *
"What's your name?" Young Sarah Leo giggled excitedly, hands on her hips as she stood in the sandpit, "I've seen you before. Do you want to play with us?"
"He can't play with us." A little blonde boy grumped, looking up at Mike, "Oh, it's you. He's okay. He's our udder brada."
"It's you!" Dade grinned, running up and hugging him from behind, "Yay, you came!"
"Dade, go play with Daniel. I'll take care of him." Sarah said, taking Mike's hand, "Otay?"
"You not my boss!" Dade gasped, "I'ma tell my Daddy on you!"
Sarah rolled her eyes and poked her tongue at him, before Dade grumped and sauntered toward his brother. Squeezing Mike's hand, Sarah smiled at him.
"Do you want to be my friend?"
* * * * * * *
"How's your application going?" Sarah asked softly, rubbing Mike's shoulders.
Mike looked down at the paper, suddenly welling up with tears. His face betrayed his anguish as he tried not to make a noise. He slammed his fists down on the desk suddenly, enough to crack the top. Then without a word, he stood up, kicked his chair away angrily, and stormed out of the room.
Sarah looked after him, starting to cry herself. She began to sob into her hands, shaking with her cries. Moments later, Mike returned to the room, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her hair in apology.
No words needed to be spoken. They both understood their frustrations, their pain. He clutched her tightly to him, tears falling down his cheeks.
"I've always loved you." He whispered, "Always just you."
* * * * * * *
"Ow!" Sarah cried out, falling off her bike.
Mike skidded his to a halt as Brad and Storm continued racing each other, not realizing Sarah had fallen. He jumped off his bike and rushed to her side, checking her knees and hands. He frowned at her.
"It's okay! My Mum's a doctor! She can save you!" He gasped, picking her up and putting her onto his bike before he pushed it two blocks home.
"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" June asked, sitting on the deck with an iced tea as Mike wheeled Sarah up to her, "Oh, I have a patient, do I?"
"Mum, she fell off her bike! You have to save her!" Mike exclaimed.
"And where's that other son of mine?" She asked with a frown, checking Sarah's grazes, "Oh this is very serious, isn't it?"
"Yes, Mum, you have to save her!"
June smiled at Mike, stroking his cheek, and in that moment, he knew everything would be alright. He smiled back, watching as she cleaned and dressed all of Sarah's wounds. She pulled Mike aside then, rubbing his back.
"And you pushed her all this way, did you?" She asked him.
"Yes, Mum, but I forgot her bike."
"Well ... you remembered what mattered, Son. You remembered to take care of Sarah when she needed you."
* * * * * * *
"Then why aren't you doing this!?" Mike screamed at Sarah, "I want a baby but I want you more! Sarah, please!"
"Shut up!" She screamed back at him, tears streaming down her cheeks, "I'm not doing this because I want another baby."
"Then why aren't you going back in? Why won't you go back in? You'll die. You'll leave me."
"I'm not doing this to die." Sarah said, wiping her eyes as she stared at him, "I'm doing this to live. I can't go through that again. And I'm too weak to take it. It wouldn't matter. I'd live in there for what, a few extra months? No. I'm staying right here. And I'm not choosing to die. I'm choosing to live, with my husband, in my home. Don't ... please don't make this any harder than it already is."
"But I don't want to live without you." Mike sobbed, "I can't live without you ..."
"Baby, I've got so many things I want to do before I die, but making you miserable isn't one of them. I want us to be so happy, like we always are, even when we fight. I'm never as happy as when I'm with you. So let's just ... live, okay? Forget about next week, next month, and let's just live. Please?"
* * * * * * *
Mike bobbed out of the water, clasping one side of the wakeboard in his hands. He giggled as Sarah did the same on the other side. Both grinned and poked their tongues at each other.
Up and down, over and over they repeated, blowing water and raspberries at each other. Mike was enjoying himself completely. When Sarah would rise up and blow raspberries at him, he'd grin as much as he could, feeling some strange tingle in his belly.
He ducked under the water, rising up again with all his might. Sarah did the same and inadvertently the two bumped heads over the wakeboard, or to be specific, they bumped lips. Both stared at each other, holding themselves up as their lips pressed against each other like blowfish. It was unexpected and new and not at all unpleasant.
* * * * * * *
"And this is your idea of living!?" Mike gasped, having to yell so his voice could be heard, "Finding as many creative ways as possible to kill your husband?"
"It sure is!" Sarah laughed, "Stop being a scaredy cat!"
"I don't like heights!"
"This isn't very high at all!" Sarah said, adjusting her goggles, "Besides, I always wanted to fly!"
Mike looked out the window, gulping at the expanse far below. Skydiving. Just one of many crazy things on Sarah's things to do list. Mike couldn't believe he was indulging her this way, but there wasn't much he wouldn't do for her.
"It's time!" The jump supervisor yelled, giving Mike and Sarah the thumbs up.
"Woo hoo!" Sarah said excitedly, firmly secured for her tandem jump.
Mike didn't quite like the idea of being firmly secured to a man behind him. Too many horror stories from Dade about how men's cocks harden when they get next to a bum. Still, the fear of going splat when he hit the ground made him rather grateful for the experienced man attached to him.
"Mum, if I come and visit you too soon, blame Saraaaaaaaaaaaaah!" He yelled, turning to a near scream as he and his partner jumped out, "Sarah, marry meeeee!"
"You dick, we're already ... oh shit!" She screamed as she too made the jump, "I'm flying!"
* * * * * * *
"Sarah!" Storm yelled at her, holding out his hand, "We're going to be late! Hurry up! What are you doing? Packing a fucking larder?"
"Sorry, Daniel, I'm coming!"
"Why do you let him talk to you like that?" Mike asked Sarah softly.
"He's my boyfriend." Sarah said, her eyes cast down as she finished packing her bag, "I ..."
"No one should talk to you like that. I'd never talk to you like that."
Sarah raised her eyes slowly, looking at him, almost a plead in her eyes, "But you aren't my boyfriend ..."
* * * * * * *
"When are you going to tell them?" Mike asked Sarah, "Storm and the others."
She lay in his arms, kissing his chest and clutching softly, "I'm not."
"But you won't get to see them if they don't come back in time."
"It doesn't matter. What matters is that ... they remember me how I should be remembered. The last time they saw me, I looked damn hot. Good way to leave it."
Mike smiled softly, kissing her cheek, "I'm currently in denial and pretending this is just the first night of the rest of our lives which will last a thousand years."
"It is, Baby." Sarah gushed, smiling blissfully as he squeezed her, "It is."
"Why don't you show me this list of yours? I want to see what other ways you have in mind to kill me."
"No!" Sarah laughed, shaking her head, "Besides, we've already done almost all of the best ones."
"Well at least tell me what your number one thing to do is. I'm curious."
Sarah grinned, rising up to kiss him on the lips, "You are."
* * * * * * *
"Don't kiss me in public like that." Storm snapped at Sarah, wiping his brow after just fighting in a match, "I've still got three fights to go. Do you want everyone thinking I'm a pussy?"
"But I was just ... I was happy. I was proud of you." Sarah frowned, looking quite demure.
"You're my girlfriend, you're not supposed to think. Just stand in the corner and look pretty."
Sarah slapped Storm at that moment, taking him by surprise. He immediately raised his hand to smack her. Before he could do that, Mike was right in his face, nose to nose.
"Don't you dare." Mike growled, pressed nose to nose against Storm.
"It's not your fucking place to interfere. Why don't you mind your own business and get your own girlfriend?"
"I'll tell Mum." Mike warned, "She'll tear your hide off."
"Don't you mean my Mum? Just like Sarah's my girlfriend?"
Storm barely felt himself being tackled to the ground. Mike wrestled with him, the two rolling over and struggling with each other. Sarah screamed frantically, trying to pull them apart.
Eventually Storm rolled off and up to his feet, staggering backwards with a grin on his face, "Didn't mean a word of it, you two. Just needed the anger amp up for my next fight. Wish me luck! Come on now, smile, you two are starting to look like an old married couple ..."
* * * * * * *
"We had so many firsts here." Mike smiled, kissing Sarah's brow and eyelids gently.
He held her softly, but surely, the two dancing barefoot on the sand. The moon was high and the married couple had spontaneously decided to leave the warmth of their home to come to the lakeside. At least Mike believed it was spontaneous, until Sarah grabbed a suitcase from the wardrobe that had her wedding dress and his suit ready and waiting.
At least doing this in the middle of the night was less likely to attract odd looks. Not that either of them would have noticed any odd looks. Their eyes and attention were firmly on each other.
"First kiss." Sarah sighed happily, staring up at her husband.
"Well, technically, our fir…"
"Shut up, my love." Sarah said quickly, "Just go with the moment."
Mike smiled, "I meant to say, oh, our first kiss? That's right. I'd forgotten."
"Better."
"First dance as husband and wife. I can still remember that day so perfectly. Every time I smell the lake air, I feel I'm there again."
Mike nodded his head, smiling as his eyes glistened a little, "This is where you married me."
"First time we kissed, first time we danced as husband and wife. First time we, well, first time you married. Only time I'll marry."
"Don't say that." Mike said, stroking her cheek, "I won't marry again. I'll live, because it's what you want me to do, but I won't marry. I married you. Once is enough for me."
"Mike ..."
"Sarah, we talked about this. I'll never change. I can't marry anyone else. Once is enough. Besides, after you, everyone else is a downgrade."
Sarah blushed at that, eyes twinkling with emotion, "Hard to argue with such wisdom. I just ... I don't want you to be lonely."
"That's just how the dice rolls when the love of your life is no longer with you. I'll find other ways to go on, but replacing you isn't one of them. It's just ... as sure as someone knows they're gay and can't be with a woman, I'm Sarah's husband and I can't marry anyone who isn't her." Mike cupped her cheeks, kissing her lips sweetly, "I still haven't given up. I'll never give up. I still want to believe. I've loved you since the first time I laid eyes on you. You're my girl. My soulmate. Where you go, I linger. When you leave, the part of me that loves another goes with you. I'm your Mike, you're my Sarah. We are what we are. Made for each other."
Sarah was already crying softly, though she still smiled up at her husband. She'd never wanted for another man since becoming a couple with him, and knowing how devoted he was to her made it that much easier. She still couldn't believe how lucky she was.
"Kiss me?" Sarah asked, fearing she'd blubber any words she attempted to speak now.
Mike tilted his head and kissed her sweetly, chastely, holding it for an eon. Sarah let out a soft gasp, the air rushing from her lungs as she melted in her husband's arms. Though she tried to stop herself, she wrapped her arms around him and kissed him harder, knowing that if she didn't, she'd burst into tears at any moment. She didn't want to leave this life. She didn't want to leave her man. She wanted to kiss him forever and forget the world. He was always so good at helping her do that.
* * * * * * *
"Lime milkshake for you." Sarah said, sitting next to Mike and handing him his milkshake.
"Oh wow, thank you." Mike said gratefully, not expecting this, "It's my favourite."
Sarah rolled her eyes, "Yeah, and like I don't know that by now."
"Didn't realise you were paying attention."
Sarah smiled at Mike, "Now you do."
The two sat on the beach, overlooking Lake Herren. Summer holidays were in full force and Merlow had been invaded by tourists. Being the only members of the Pack still in Merlow, the two friends decided to hit the beach together.
"Marcel is hating St. Petersburg." Sarah said, sipping on her shake.
"Storm and Dade are enjoying their cruise."
"Are we enjoying our holiday?" Sarah asked Mike, "Maybe we should have more fun of our own. I'm a little cold after our swim."
Mike quickly grabbed his football jacket and wrapped it around her. The weather had turned a little cool after they'd emerged from the water. She appreciated his gesture and smiled at him, before shifting a little closer.
He tentatively put an arm around her, holding her. He'd always been careful not to overstep any boundaries, but things had been awfully confusing for him since Sarah called time out on her relationship with Storm.
"That's better." Sarah sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder.
"You sure?" Mike asked, rubbing her arm, "Do you want me to walk you home?"
"Bobby asked me out last week."
Mike stiffened immediately, and in the back of his mind plotted different ways to tackle Bobby harder in training. Sarah seemed to pick up on this and giggled a little. She tilted her head up and looked at him.
Without thinking, and doing something he never expected himself to do, he leaned in and pressed his lips softly against Sarah's. He'd been dancing around this for so long, trying to figure out a way to ask her if she'd ever date him, but he never considered himself worthy of her affections. She was smart, bright, bubbly, the most beautiful girl in school, and he was ... well, he was Mike. Plain old Mike.
Yet the thought that someone else might get their chance when he'd waited so long was simply unacceptable. And so he kissed her. Much to his shock and amazement, she kissed him right back, exhaling as if she'd been waiting for him an eternity to do this.
His chest swelled and he found himself feeling something he never had before. He'd known deep down that he loved Sarah, but it truly wasn't until his lips met hers that he realised how much he loved her. This feeling was so very new to him. He felt light, almost breathless. He knew from this very moment, his life would never be the same again. It'd be perfect.
* * * * * * *
"Mike, I'm dying." Sarah said bluntly to him, sitting on the sofa, staring up at him, "How many times do I have to tell you? This is it this time. We don't get a second chance."
"We have to do something!" Mike pleaded, "We beat it before. We can do it again."
"Your Mum's gone. She can't save me. I'm too weak, my kidneys are fucked after the last chemo. I can't go through that again even if I wanted to. It's just delaying the inevitable. I don't want to die on my knees. I want to live on my feet, standing. That's how Sarah rolls. That's how Sarah does it. I'm not going out like a fucking invalid."
"You're my wife!" Mike snapped at her, overcome with emotion and showing rare anger that he knew was simply fear for losing his girl, "If I tell you to go and do it, you'll do it!"
"Yes, actually, I would. Because I love you. But are you really going to ask me, knowing how strongly I don't want to do it?" She asked softly, calmly, "Would you, Mike?"
"You can't leave me." He cried, cupping her face and leaning his against hers, "Don't leave me."
"Is everything okay?" Brad asked, surprising them both.
Given they were in the kitchen and he was bringing in his dinner plate, it was no surprise he'd walked in on them. Mike sniffled, turning away but keeping his face pressed against Sarah's. He was still crying softly.
"Just ... boy girl stuff." Sarah said, feigning a smile, "We're fine, Sweetheart."
"Are you sure?"
"I'm sure. Now come on, group hug."
"Oh, Dude, so there." Lucas said, skidding into the kitchen, "Group hugs win!"
Brad set his and Lucas's plates in the dishwasher before they formed a group hug with Mike and Sarah. Though it ended up being a three man hug with Sarah in the middle surrounded by the three men. Mike was smiling by now, welcoming the warmth, though his eyes were still glistening.
Mike kissed both Lucas and Brad's cheeks, grateful for their presence. He gripped them tighter, before he kissed the top of Sarah's head. Though neither Brad or Lucas realised it, Mike was eternally grateful that they were such a constant part of his and Sarah's lives.
"Goodness, I'm surrounded by three fit, strapping, gorgeous men. Who wants an orgy?"
"Hugs over!" Mike said, pulling Sarah out of the hug, making loopy signs around his head, "She's really tired and talking a lot of nonsense."
"Come on, you big lug." Sarah laughed, pulling him along by the hand, "Goodnight, Boys. Wear earmuffs to bed, I'm ravaging my husband tonight."
* * * * * * *
"Ow, it hurts." Sarah grimaced, biting her lip, "It's too big."
Mike's eyes went wide, gripping her hips to hold her up and stop her from sinking any further on his erection. As much as he wanted to make love to his girl, he sure wasn't going to hurt her. She slapped his hand in annoyance to make him stop.
"Ow!" He gasped, "You said it hurts, I haven't even popped your cherry yet."
"You have experience at this?"
"You know I don't." He sighed, "I've been waiting for you."
"I'm sorry, it's just ... I'm not used to this. It's just so big."
"And saying that isn't going to make it any smaller!"
Sarah paused, gripping her hands on Mike's pecs, "Damn, but you are gorgeous."
"You said that already today when you made me do a pose off with Bobby. I wish you wouldn't do that."
"You're hot, you're mine, and I like to brag." Sarah giggled, "Mike ... just tell me something, you love me, don't you?"
Mike half smiled, raising one hand to stroke her cheek, "Just you. Don't remember even thinking about anyone else. You know I love you."
Sarah pushed herself up and plunged herself down completely, letting out a sharp scream. Mike's erection tore through her maidenhood, bringing tears to her eyes. He stared at her in shock, though he couldn't help letting a gasp.
"Whoa ... this is way better than my hand." He gasped, before he started smothering her face in kisses, "Baby, you shouldn't have. I love you, I love you. We don't have to do this."
Sarah cried from the pain, but quickly caught herself, tears falling down her cheeks, "I want this more than you want this. Please. Please, Mike."
Mike nodded, starting to feel a little lost for words now as his brain moved from one head to another. He kissed Sarah fiercely, gently, while his arms wrapped firmly around her. He'd never done this before, and neither had she. Perhaps that's what made this so perfect. That for all the clumsy fumbling and awkward rocking, neither of them thought life would ever get any better than this.
* * * * * * *
"Where's Mike?" Brad asked Sarah, kissing her good morning on the cheek as he walked past her and started putting some toast in for breakfast.
"He had to go out and put something in the post." Sarah said, fiddling with the scrambled eggs she was making.
Sarah rubbed her brow, yawning a little tiredly. She tipped the eggs into a serving dish next to some bacon, before Brad carried them to the table. She didn't always cook breakfast. Often Brad would beat her to it, and even Lucas on nights he slept over.
"You okay?" Brad asked her, frowning.
She looked a little pale today as she sat down to eat. Brad tipped her a glass of orange juice, before the familiar sight of a half naked Lucas sauntered in, yawning and stretching.
"Mmm, smells good. Guess I'm on dishes." Lucas said, taking some toast, before he looked at Sarah, "You okay, Dude? You look a little pale."
"I said the same thing." Brad said, taking a bite of his toast, "You okay?"
"Yeah just a little tired." Sarah smiled, fiddling with some toast, "That's all."
"These eggs are great." Lucas said, eating heartily and smiling.
Brad was about to say the same when he turned to Sarah and saw she was starting to sway a bit. Before he could get up she started convulsing and fell off her chair, starting to have a seizure on the floor.
Lucas and Brad were at her side in an instant, "Brad, call an ambulance!"
"What's wrong with her!?"
Lucas knew just by looking at her what was wrong with her, and it made his blood run cold, "Just call it now! And call Mike! Hold on, Sarah Dude, hold on ..."
* * * * * * *
"I'll never go through this again!" Sarah screamed with all her might, "I hate you!"
Mike had been through this enough times with her to know she didn't mean it. She was well into her chemo treatment now and each instance of it made her behaviour more and more erratic. He wondered how something that was supposed to help her, could do her so much harm.
She had lost almost all her hair. She was pale and gaunt. She'd lost so much weight. She was a frail shadow of her former self. He didn't know if the cancer was doing this or the chemotherapy.
He often had to struggle with her to get her to come into the hospital when it was time for a new chemo cycle. She'd scream and throw things around their small apartment, crying and cursing him. Yet just as he always did, he remained calm and composed, knowing that this was the best hope he had to keep her alive, to keep her with him.
"God, it burns!" Sarah screamed out, eyes clenched shut as lay on the hospital bed.
"I know, Baby." Mike said, kissing her hand and holding it to his cheek, "And if I could take all of this for you, I would. Every last bit of it. The cancer, the chemo. I'd take it all for you. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, Baby."
Sarah seemed to calm slowly at those words, though she still cried from the physical pain she was in, "Just promise me, you'll never make me go through this again. I'd rather die ..."
* * * * * * *
"But Dude, you should tell them." Lucas whispered to Mike, "I mean ... she's ... she's ..."
"She's dying, Lucas." Mike said, looking drawn from thinking on that thought far too much lately, yet still on the verge of more tears after crying so many already, "And she doesn't have very long. But she is going to get everything she asks me for. You and Brad know, so be it. But nobody else unless she says so. She wants to die on her own terms. She is my wife, and I will grant her every wish until she has no more left to ask."
Lucas was already a mess of tears by the time Mike had finished, wrapping his arms around him. He couldn't believe this was happening. After all that Mike and Sarah had been through, and after she'd fought so hard to beat her cancer before, it had come back, and Lucas knew why.
He was no doctor. He tended to lean toward the more spiritual aspects of life. And right now his spirit was telling him that Sarah was dying of a broken heart and spirit. Ever since losing her baby, he'd felt something was wrong. If the person responsible for hurting Sarah wasn't already imprisoned, Lucas and every other member of the Pack would have ended him the way they did Marcel's attacker. Or at least he and Storm would have.
While Lucas felt a sense of anguish and disbelief, it was overshadowed by an underlying sense of rage. He broke down into sobs, kissed Mike's cheek and rushed downstairs. He wanted to break something, to hurt someone. He stopped only to tell Brad they were taking a trip to White Swan. Brad nodded in understanding and left immediately with Lucas.
Mike had a feeling they were going to do something they shouldn't, but he was too tired to bother trying to stop them. Vengeance wouldn't bring his child back. It wouldn't keep his girl with him. He could face that anguish after the ... after the end came. Right now, all he wanted, was to be near his girl.
* * * * * * *
"It's a boy!" Sarah laughed, painting the walls of the baby's room, "I can tell, okay?"
"It could be a girl!" Mike laughed, painting next to her.
"Fine, fine, it's an effeminate boy. Happy now?"
"With that kind of pedigree, we'll have to name him Storm."
"Oh behave." Sarah laughed, painting a dot on the tip of Mike's nose.
Mike picked her up, causing her to drop her brush. She giggled and squealed as he nuzzled his paint covered nose against her cheek. He was ever so mindful with her, his fragile Queen. Even more so now that she was pregnant. He wouldn't risk it.
"We're having a baby!" Mike gushed, grinning as he kissed her, "Can you believe it?"
"I can! You fuck me enough!" Sarah laughed.
"Guilty as charged there."
"Hmm." Sarah said, wrapping an arm around Mike's neck, content to be carried by him, "So we've got baby blue paint. We've got your Mum's crib and hand me downs."
"You don't mind that, do you? I mean, Dade used them for June. It's tradition now, you know?"
"Oh, I wouldn't have it any other way." Sarah said, "I'm just trying to think of what else we might want for this room."
"Baby monitor. Heck, I'll call Dade and ask him."
"Goody goody!" Sarah said excitedly, "Okay, what about names? We have to decide on one so we can put it on the wall! You can make those wooden letter things."
"Daniel?"
"It'd just go to his head." Sarah grinned, "But I was thinking of it. I mean, he is the third part of our little trio."
"What about Phelan?" Mike offered, "I really like that name. Phelan Paul Leo-Marcus. One name for each of my brothers. Oh, but what about your brothers?"
"I'm not as close to them as I am to Dade and Storm. And they mean the world to you. I'll get the next name. You get Phelan Paul Leo-Marcus for your son."
Mike closed his eyes, letting the name fill his mind and his heart and his hopes. He was going to be a father. Phelan Paul Leo-Marcus.
* * * * * * *
"Mummy?"
Sarah awoke with a start and a cry, looking around herself. She felt a rush of panic, as if she could feel someone, something around her. She had more and more of these panic attacks lately, and was starting to find it difficult to discern reality from her deteriorating mind.
"Sweetheart?" Sarah called, having sworn she'd heard a boy's voice calling her, "Mummy's here, Baby. Sweetheart?"
Mike rushed into the room, sitting at her side. He checked over her quickly, cupping her face. She looked at him with eyes that seemed to have lost some of their brightness. She was fading so quickly, he'd barely had time to adjust to the fact she was soon going to leave him.
"Mike? Did you hear that?" Sarah asked him after sipping some water and taking medication designed only to ease her pain, "Did you hear our boy?"
"No." Mike said, shaking his head and trying not to cry at the mention of their son, "I didn't, my girl. I never heard him at all. I wish I did."
Sarah started to cry as she looked up at Mike, "Baby? It's going to happen soon, isn't it?"
Mike couldn't answer that out loud, but Dr. Jesse Haslan had taken a special interest in Sarah's case out of respect for his late mentor, June Marcus. The day before he told Mike that Sarah did not have long at all, and that all he could do was make her as comfortable as possible. Mike was coping with this as best he could.
"I'm so scared." Sarah sobbed, clutching to Mike's shirt, "I want to stay. I'm so afraid."
The words tore at Mike's heart and it was all he could do then not to wish the Earth would open up and swallow them both. He couldn't help his girl. He couldn't protect her. He couldn't save her. He could barely comfort her. She was so scared to die and he couldn't do anything.
"I am too." Mike confessed, starting to sob into her hair as he kissed it, "I'm so scared. So scared, Baby. I'm so sorry. So sorry I couldn't help you. So sorry I couldn't save you. I don't want to live without you. I don't want to live."
His tears flowed freely down his face, and he began to shake as he let out his own grief. There was little comfort for either of them. She was scared, and so was he. He'd tried so hard to stay strong for her, but he was beginning to break. Perhaps that was why she finally did too.
* * * * * * *
"This is wonderful." Sarah said, dancing slowly with Mike, staring up at him with a smile on her face, "Never thought we'd be back here."
"One last hurrah." Mike said, kissing his wife sweetly, "If you weren't already my wife, I'd have asked you a thousand times by now. There's never been anyone else for but you, my girl."
Sarah smiled, for once not trying to deflect Mike's sentiment with a joke. She kissed his nose, his mouth, his chin, and then his neck. For all of his steadfastness, she knew how much he adored and depended on her. Perhaps love was more appropriate a term than depend. She knew he could survive without her if necessary, he simply didn't want to because he loved her and no other.
"The moment we became a couple, I knew it was you for the rest of my life." Sarah said softly, "As corny and unbelievable as that sounds, I have never loved another and I never will, the way I love you. You've done so much for me. You've supported me in my darkest hours. You've tolerated me in my most unbearable moments. All I want is to wake up next to you. I think as long as I have that, I'll want for nothing."
"I love you." Mike whispered, pressing a small kiss on her lips, "I love you so much. I don't remember being this happy before as I am now. Here, at home, with you, healthy, pregnant, surrounded by everyone we love. I wish I could pause life right now and live in this moment, like this, forever ..."
* * * * * * *
In the very spot they were married, Mike sat on the beach, Sarah wrapped in a blanket and nestled in his lap. She was particularly cold today, and wanted to see the lake again. She wanted to see the place she'd married her husband.
"So pretty today." Sarah whispered, smiling softly as she stared out over the lake, "It's not night time, is it? Seems so quiet."
"It's not night time." Mike said, kissing her cheek and holding his lips there.
"Baby?"
"I'm here, my girl. I'm right here."
"I want ... I want ... a big family. Three boys and ... three girls."
"That many?" Mike asked, smiling at her, "It'll be quite a chore for me to make them."
"Oh ... that's okay. The postman can help."
Mike almost choked at that comment, "Yeah no, I can take care of that myself, thank you."
Sarah giggled softly, "Still so ..."
"Possessive? Jealous? Unreasonable?"
"Perfect." Sarah smiled, closing her eyes and letting the wind caress her face, "So perfect."
"Like you?"
Sarah looked up at Mike, smiling weakly at him, "Can I keep you forever?"
"Sarah ..." Mike smiled, trying not to cry, "You had me the first time I ever saw you. And you'll have me forever. You'll have me forever."
"Forever is just a little while more. Just a little while more."
"Forever is forever." Mike said, starting to cry now, but still trying not to, "Can I keep you forever?"
"You already have me, my love. I just ... want to be ... here with you. And ..." Sarah said weakly, raising her finger to point at him, "And ... for you ... to tell me about our ... about our life."
Mike nodded his head, wiping his nose as he stared out over the water. He imagined their life, years from now. The thought made him smile.
"Our life? You and I argue a lot. Well ... you argue. I nod my head and you get angry and I nod my head more. You calm down, we make love. This happens repeatedly." Mike smiled tearfully, "And thus we end up with a lot of kids. Our oldest we named Marcel, and he's just like him. So strong, so caring."
"Am I ... still hot?"
"You're so hot, you're the biggest Milf on the block." Mike gushed, "And we're so happy. Looking after kids in that house, making it our home. And Storm comes back every now and then, sometimes alone, sometimes with his man. And Uncle Dade brings June, and she's so grown up, and she loves our babies. And Brad, he found a nice girl, and they got married and he's got two kids. And they love and he loves you, because you were like the sister he never had. And our house is so, so full. It's so full, Baby. It's so happy. We're so happy."
Without looking down, Mike burst into tears. He kept staring out over the water, stifling his silent cries. He could feel in his arms. He could feel it. His beautiful girl had left him.
He didn't want to look down. He didn't need to. He could tell by the incredible emptiness he felt in his heart. He'd never loved another and he never would. He only had one girl. He only had one. And for all his trying. For all his hopes and prayers. She'd still left him.
He held her close, still staring out over the water. Her body was warm, her presence was irreplaceable, and he knew he'd never have this feeling again. So he held her. He held her, and he continued to tell her just what she'd asked him to.
"When the kids ... when they're all grown up and gone." Mike whispered, "We'd sit out on the deck. We'd have iced teas and we'd wonder how ... how we still kept so hot after all these years. And I'd just look at you ... I'd look at you ..."
He started to cry again, clutching Sarah tightly as he sobbed. He kept his eyes on the horizon, trying to compose himself. He took a deep breath, before finally continuing.
"And I'd wonder how you never lost a step. You'd still have to fight me off because I was so bloody into you. And then, right at the end. Maybe sixty, maybe seventy years from now, we'd be right in this spot. And we'd be remembering decades ago about how our friends made such a big deal about things that didn't even matter in the end. Because all I cared about ... was being together ... with the people I loved. With my girl. And so I say ..."
Mike paused, sobbing profusely now. He could barely muster words to speak now. He could barely stop himself from crying, from sobbing as he held his girl in his arms. His beautiful, beautiful girl. She was finally at peace. Finally free from the ravaging and the torment she'd endured so bravely. And so, unable to muster much more in the way of words, Mike finally looked down. He finally looked down at the peaceful, almost sleeping girl in his arms. He leaned down, kissed her sweetly on the lips, still warm, and whispered ...
"Goodnight, My Love, Goodnight."
* * * * * * *
"Do you want to be friends or not?" Sarah asked, tilting her head and giggling at Mike, "I like you."
Mike bit his chubby little finger and looked at the other kids playing in the sandpit around him, before he turned to his Mummy who was watching close by. He gave her a look as if uncertain he should talk to this new girl who had a funny laugh and acted like a boy.
"It's okay, Sweetheart." June smiled at the little tyke, "Go on. Play with whoever you like."
Mike turned his attention back to the girl and took his finger out of his mouth, "I want to play. Mummy says it's okay."
"Yay! Let's just play me and you." Sarah said, pulling Mike down onto the sand with her.
"Shall we play forever and ever?"
"Umm ... otay!" Sarah agreed, before she giggled again, "You didn't tell me your name yet! What's your name?"
"I'm Mike. I'm a big boy now."
The little girl smiled brightly at that, "Hi, Mike. I'm Sarah ..."
* * * * * * *
Storm Front Concludes in SF5.15
'It Ended In A Bus'
On to Chapter 5.15
"It Ended on a Bus"
Back to Chapter 5.13 Part 4
"Ever Hopeful - Part 4"
Chapter Index
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